Tuesday, October 27, 2009

friends and family

to take a break from writing about work life, i'm recounting some moments where i've felt like a normal person over the past few months, which generally involves connecting with friends and family on my precious days off. although im on vacation now with chris in bangkok (yay!), i normally get one day off every 7-8 days while im on the wards or in the icu. im often tempted to sleep the whole day, but then would waste an entire day off and miss spending time with chris, so lately i've been more proactive about seeing people and doing things. this has been helped by the fact that a lot of friends and family have visited over the past few months, including:

rollie and meena from michigan! our first real houseguests, they cooked us amazing vegetarian meals like dutch babies (pancakes, not people) and enchiladas. in turn, we took them to the inner harbor where both me and meena got food poisoning from phillip's seafood. crab mac and cheese sounded like a great idea to begin with, but didn't turn out so well in the end...

meeting up with judy, a fellow swattie classmate in dc, who invited us to a "crafty bastards", a local diy craft fair which also showcased a breakdancing competition. one of our fave booths at this fair was mean cards ,a collection of hilarious cards for all different occasions. judy regaled us with stories from her days of intensive russian language learning at USAID, while i ate ice cream and drank coffee and whined about intern life.

sleepover with sae-rom, a fellow AMSA GHAC'er who's spending a year at Hopkins School of Public Health and is never in town, ever.

catching up with liz and andrea in dc, who came out for the annual GLMA conference. we mostly just hung out in dupont circle near the fountain, but it was great to catch up with some michigan peeps. i've also run into former classmates at bayview, including having a late night coffee with carl miller while he was on nights in the radiology reading room, and catching a short conversation with christina weng, who kindly came to do an ophthamology consult while i was in the CCU.

going to the sauna in columbia as rachel, a co-intern's guest. chatting and drinking ice cold water out of bell jars that rachel provided.

eating a post-call early dinner with mary (friend from high school) and her boyfriend tom, before they ran off to virginia for a peace corps friend wedding.

hanging out with matt alemu, a ford school classmate, who kindly drove out to visit us to play wii with chris :) .

having my family over and taking them out to eat chinese food, thai food, italian food...yoda remembering them and being super excited! (they came to pick him up to dogsit him while chris and i are on vacation in bangkok).

snapshots of intern life

i was really good about writing for awhile, but then fell off the wagon when i started my first month on the wards (general medicine inpatient service) and then went straight from there to the cardiac icu. i've taken care of a lot of patients during that time, and had some real ups and downs, but i've also realized that i'm becoming a lot more competent and don't totally panic whenever i get a page in the middle of the night, which is a real improvement.

i've also gotten more used to my schedule, and realized it was a sad day (or perhaps a happy one?) when I got out of work after being there for 12 hrs and was rejoicing because I was going home early. mind you, the only reason i realized this was because i called chris and he was like, "um, i thought early was like 4 pm or something, not 6:30." grrr chris and his normal job! at the beginning of intern year, i did harbor some resentment against chris for working a third of the hours and getting paid disproportionately more money, but i am pretty over it and am thankful that he's able to entertain himself on my call days by doing various home improvement projects, like painting and installing recessed lighting. i also really appreciate that he drives me to work on call days and picks me up post-call so i don't have to drive after being up for over 30 hrs!

speaking of being up for over 30 hrs, i feel like call is when i really get to bond with a lot of people, including not only my fellow interns and residents, but also nursing and other ancillary staff, and finally, with patients. while on the wards, we take call every 4th night, which means that as an intern, we'll admit five patients to our service over the day and serve as the primary physician for that patient until they're either discharged from the hospital or transferred to another service.

because so many of our patients either don't have insurance or are really underinsured, their health care can often be really fragmented. as an inpatient, case managers, social workers, and medical staff attempt to bring about a smooth transition to outpatient care, but things don't always work out. this can be because a patient doesn't show up for follow-up, but that can be for so many reasons, like they didn't have a ride, or didn't have the money for co-pay or whatever. i've also been impressed by a serious lack of primary care among our patients, and tried to use the connections i make with patients to establish primary care relationships with them when possible.

one patient that i really hope to see in clinic soon had a pretty terrible infection that started in a joint and spread to the blood. patient X also had a bunch of other complications from the original infection, which required long-term intravenous antibiotics. a lot of times people can get a PICC line placed and go home and get their IV antibiotics, but if you have a history of drug abuse, that's usually a no-go. this is interesting to me, because if you don't have a urine toxicology screen that's positive, the only way you would have this kind of information is if the patient discloses to you or you have some old records documenting this (or you can just be suspicious, given their own history if there's complications related to drug use). in any case, if you are an IV drug user, you don't get home IV antibiotics because there's a fear (likely well-founded) that you'll inject illicit drugs into your central line (which goes straight to your heart). this also means that in order to get IV antibiotics, you have to go stay in a nursing facility instead of going home for up to months at a time, depending on the length of course of your particular antibiotics.

this particular patient totally denied past IV drug use, but later admitted to it when a complication happened that's more often than not seen in drug users, although it probably wasn't related in this person's case. because she had so many complications, she ended up being re-admitted to the hospital a few times during my month ont he wards and i got to spend some time with her, sharing her frustrations at failed treatments, or setbacks in the road to recovery. when we finally got to discharge her home, she asked if it was ok to give me a hug and thanked me for not just taking care of her, but also really caring about her, which was totally great.

ive had lots of little moments like this throughout residency so far. sitting with an italian immigrant patient an talking about where our families are from and who makes up our family now and listening to him talk about how he used to go dancing in the city. taking a break from writing history and physicals with a co-intern to watch music videos together on youtube 20 hrs in to a 30+ hr shift. holding a patient's hand when he requested to be taken off oxygen so that he could die peacefully and with dignity, without noise, without machines. saying goodbye to another patient who had been through so much in his fifty years of life, and feeling sorry that i'd never gotten to buy him the fried chicken that he'd asked for, feeling even sorrier that he couldn't eat in the last two weeks of his life. a unit secretary feeling sorry for me as i fell asleep at a computer and bringing me a fresh cup of coffee that she'd fixed at 4 am. feeling proud of myself when i got an arterial line on my first stick, feeling bad about myself when i couldn't thread a central line, and a little less bad when the resident couldn't do it either. seeing people suffer and recover, and really respecting the strength of a lot of people in times of great distress.

i think that's what i've most appreciated about my intern year so far -connecting with people.